By: Eli

So many thoughts about this movie. Agreed with most everything the panelists said! It was complicated and messy and hit me in my feels and was a trashy lesbian movie and a holiday rom com and so many things.

Definitely add me to the list of people who the situation resonated with, in a hard way. Having been the Abby in this situation, I felt that the movie didn’t really do justice to Abby OR Harper. In a lot of ways, it felt like the movie blamed Harper for not being out more than her awful behavior, and that was a trope that I felt really overly simplified Harper’s situation. I wished that the way Dan Levy’s character framed it was more prevalent throughout the movie: when to come out to family, if ever, is such a personal and terrifying decision, and something that someone can only do when they’re ready. I don’t think the movie properly addressed at all the experience of being outed by a sibling at a huge family party??

And at the same time, Harper’s character treated Abby horribly. Honestly, one of the plot points I found most disturbing was Riley’s story of her high school relationship with Harper. It was a small moment, but it seemed like the turning point for the whole movie that reframed Abby’s understanding of the whole situation. That kind of high school queer story is real and incredibly painful. For Harper not to have dealt with it and not to have told Abby is wild. Harper is very much an in-progress person, and even though that’s what the plot of the movie is centered on, I don’t think it really gave her space to grow or deal with her shit.

Put me on team Abby + Riley! Can’t say enough about how incredible and queer Aubrey Plaza was!!! IMO her acting was head and shoulders above everyone else, and she and KStew had incredible chemistry. Could have watched an entire movie of the two of them talking. This is frankly the best I’ve seen Aubrey Plaza! Alison Brie was also great in her side role.

So, a complicated movie, that hits some fun notes but doesn’t really do justice for either of its main characters. And yet, I have watched so many trash lesbian movies! My standards are very low! Ultimately, I think it actually fits very well into the messiness of lesbian movies, especially lesbian rom coms; it’s not prestige drama, but I didn’t expect it to be. On one level it was wholly unrealistic and not trying to be, and another it definitely hit some deep points of queer relationships and life – again, very in-genre for a lesbian movie to not know what it wants to be!