By: Kamala Puligandla

In reply to onion.

Have you all read the other pieces in this series? I’m genuinely curious what you think! I think this gender dynamic might be more complex than than is being read here, ie, it’s not about a cis butch woman partner, it’s about an amab non-binary partner who feels masc & femme and wants to be in conversation with the author about all the ways they show up, especially as a white person, in their gender.

and while I appreciate the critique that there is nothing inherently masculine and feminine (real, I agree) that’s not, as the noodlesforever mentions below, always the reality of how people behave in sexual dynamics and relationships, for all kinds of reasons. a lot of this series is about this author figuring out how to interact with and own the many expectations she and her partners have of her, related to what it means to be a “femme.”